Starting a new relationship can be exciting, but it can also be nerve-wracking.
Unfortunately, it’s not uncommon for one person in the relationship to pull away early on, leaving the other person feeling confused and hurt.
While it’s easy to blame oneself in these situations, it’s important to remember that there are many potential reasons why someone might pull away early in a relationship.
In this post, we’ll explore some possible reasons why men might pull away early in a relationship, helping you to better understand what might be going on and how to handle the situation.
The Top 12 Reasons Men Pull Away in New Relationships
1. Fear of commitment:
Different people have different ideas about commitment.
Some men may feel overwhelmed by the idea of committing to a relationship, especially when they have had a negative experience in the past.
It might not even be their direct experience but someone close to them.
It could be their brother, a best friend, a cousin, or even their father.
They might see commitment as a subtle means to put an end to their own individuality.
As a result, in a bid to protect themselves, they pull away.
Typically, you should know in this kind of situation that it is not you it is them.
2. Emotional baggage:
Men tend to put up a show as to being the emotionally dependable ones.
It will shock you to know that there are so many men with unresolved emotional issues from previous relationships.
These issues have eaten so deep into them that it has formed a part of their lives.
As a result, it makes it difficult for them to fully invest in a new relationship.
They usually take a lot of time to heal, and in the process, they begin to withdraw from their relationship.
These issues at the same time make them believe that a new relationship can probably not work out and there is no point in investing in it.
As a woman, if you find yourself with this kind of man, especially when you have healed yourself of your own emotional baggage, you might end up being frustrated with his acts.
You can either have a conversation with him about it or take a bow before you burn out.
3. Lack of interest:
Interest is a very interesting thing when it comes to relationships.
You’ll be surprised that a man just wants something casual with a woman who wants to build her whole life around him.
Where there are varying interests or levels of attraction in a relationship, a man tends to pull off if he realises that he can not build up to that level with the woman.
This is just him being unable to put up with the emotions that might be going back and forth in the relationship.
When you notice that you have a very different level of interest in the relationship, it is better to let him go when he begins to pull away.
4. Work or personal stress:
When a man has stressors in his life, it might be difficult to get along with him.
Focusing on the relationship will be a very hard thing for him to do as well.
Men are very poor at maintaining their emotional balance while faced with difficulties in the real world.
When this happens, you see them beginning to pull away from a relationship in order for them to sort out their personal stress.
If he senses that it’s a need that will be recurring and it might impact his love life, he might all together stop being forthcoming in the relationship.
At this point, it’s best to leave him alone to sort out his issues than for you to get dragged into it.
5. Fear of rejection:
When a man begins to show interest in you at the onset, it is all sweet and lovely, especially when it is mutual.
Then, it gets to a point where there needs to be a stronger sense of commitment from both parties.
At this point, if it is the man that is taking the initiative, it might be a hard thing for him, especially when he is used to being rejected by women.
He may begin to pull away to protect himself as a result of the rejections he has received in the past.
The fear of rejection may be a strong force that will push him to withdraw from you in order to protect himself.
The fear might be so manifest, especially when he feels you have not given him enough green light to pursue the relationship.
6. Incompatibility:
Initial attraction or strong physical connection does not guarantee compatibility in a relationship.
When a man begins to pull away from a relationship, it may be due to the fact that he sees that you are not compatible.
He might see that you have different ideals and orientations towards life.
This might impact the relationship in the long run, and to avoid it, he will pull away early.
This will even be faster when he sees that the ground or which you do not complement each other are not negotiable.
7. Lack of communication:
Communication is key in any relationship, and if a man feels like he can not communicate effectively with his partner, he may pull away.
Communication is not just about talking.
There are also things you understand when you are not saying anything to each other.
So, in essence, a man that can not seem to get along with his woman will definitely pull away from her.
It is all premised on the fact that he might end up being misunderstood more often the whole time he tries to talk.
Also, it might not be about the things being said.
It might be about the conduct and reaction to things not being said, such as body language.
When a man does not improve on the communication gap between the both of you, you can be sure that he is already pulling away from you.
Men do this early enough in relationships when they see that it will pose a problem in the long run.
8. Feeling smothered:
It is very easy to be carried away by the waves of a new relationship
However, it is important to note that you were once an individual before entering into the relationship and as such if you begin to act too clingy or needy your man may pull away to create more distance.
It is not about him not loving you as much as he did initially.
It is about you smothering him and not giving him breathing space.
Give him space and let him breathe if you do not want him to move away from you permanently.
9. Fear of losing independence:
Men may be worried that a relationship will limit their independence or ability to pursue their own interests.
This fear is so evident that they try to limit your access to their lives.
In building this limit they begin to pull away from you in order to just raise that barrier.
Men do not like losing their independence and they believe that a commitment to a relationship will be the end of their independence.
They also believe that a relationship makes them very accountable and as such they might just pull away from you all together at the onset.
This is him not wanting the reality of a relationship to put a leash on his personal freedom.
10. Trust issues:
A man can have trust issues from past relationships or other experiences which can make it difficult for him to fully trust a new partner.
This is not to say that you have given him a ground to not trust you.
It is simply him not having healed from the fact that he has been in a situation before where his trust was breached.
If you try to make things work but he’s still pulling away from you as a result of this it is best you let him.
It takes a man to trust you for who you are and not you forcing him to trust you.
If he chooses not to trust you and eventually pulls away early in the relationship for reasons best known to him, it is best to let him be.
11. Feeling pressured:
When a man is moving at a slower pace than a woman, he might feel pressured to commit fully to her.
That pressure is what most men avoid in a relationship and as such, it leads them to have to always pull away early.
Not all men want to move a relationship forward too quickly.
The pressure, either subtle or overt, can be a trigger for them, forcing them to withdraw from you in the long run.
12. Lack of chemistry:
It is surprising that two people who may have great conversations and get along well do not have that physical chemistry for a romantic relationship.
Physical chemistry is very important in a relationship.
We have always heard that men are moved by what they see and women by what they hear.
When a man realises that the woman he is engaging with does not excite him, then he might pull away early from her to avoid unmet expectations in the long run.